A Blog for Big-Hearted Overthinkers

​Many people think of values as guidelines for living life or conducting business. Your values are what you believe are important in life. They serve as a filter for the decisions you make and the things you do. You can use values to set goals, make decisions, and live a more fulfilling life. When it comes to business, your values can guide you in choosing the right clients, suppliers, and partners. They can also help you build a positive company culture. Let’s take a closer look at why values are so important. 

Why Values Are Important
Your values are important because they are a part of who you are. They shape your thoughts, emotions, and actions. You use them to make decisions about what is right and wrong, what is acceptable and unacceptable. When you live according to your values, you feel good about yourself and the things you do. You have a sense of purpose and direction. Values can also give you a sense of belonging and community. When you share your values with others, you develop relationships with like-minded people. 

In business, your values can guide you in making decisions about the products or services you offer, the pricing of your products or services, how you treat your employees and customers, and other aspects of running a business. When you live by your values in business, you attract clients who share your values. This creates loyalty and repeat business. Your values also help you build lasting relationships with suppliers, vendors, and other partners. 

How to Develop Your Values 
If you’re not sure what your personal or professional values are, there are a few exercises you can do to develop them. 

One exercise is to think about times when you’ve felt really good about yourself or what you’ve done. What were the circumstances? What did you do or say? What did others do or say? This will give you some clues about what might be important to you. 

Another exercise is to imagine yourself 10 years from now looking back on your life or career. What would make you proud? What would make you happy? This will help you identify the areas of your life that are most important to you. 
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You can also take an inventory of the people who are important to you—family members, friends, co-workers—and think about the qualities they have that make them valuable to you. Do they have similar qualities? This can give you some insight into what qualities might be important to you as well.

List of Values
If you're still stuck, choose 10 words that resonate with you from the list below, then cut it down to 5, then cut it down to 3.  This might be difficult - but go with your gut!

You may have heard that practicing gratitude can improve your well-being and relationships, but did you know that there is actual science to support these claims? Countless studies have shown that gratitude has a number of benefits for both mental and physical health. Here are just a few of the ways in which gratitude can change your life for the better.

​Gratitude improves physical health.
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One study published in Behaviour Research and Therapy found that participants who kept gratitude journals reported fewer health complaints than those who did not. Another study looked at older adults with chronic pain and found that those who wrote about things they were grateful for experienced less pain and fatigue, slept better, and had more energy than those who did not practice gratitude. ​One study found that grateful people were more likely to take care of their health, exercise regularly, and eat a healthy diet. Another study found that gratitude is linked with lower blood pressure and a reduced risk for heart disease.

Gratitude strengthens relationships.
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In one study, participants were asked to either express gratitude to their partner or request something from their partner. Those who expressed gratitude reported feeling closer to their partner and more satisfied with their relationship than those who made a request. Gratitude also improved relationship satisfaction among couples dealing with PTSD. In another study, participants who wrote about things they were grateful for experienced increased social connectedness.

Gratitude Can Improve Your Mental Health
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If you’re struggling with anxiety or depression, gratitude can help. Expressing gratitude has been shown to decrease depressive symptoms and increase levels of happiness and well-being. Gratitude can also help you cope with stress in a healthier way by increasing your resilience in the face of adversity.

Gratitude enhances well-being.

Writing about things you are grateful for has been shown to increase levels of happiness and life satisfaction, as well as reduce depression. One study found that participants who kept a daily gratitude journal reported higher levels of positive emotions, optimism, vitality, alertness, and determination, as well as less anxiety and depression. Another study found similar results in adolescents. Not only does gratitude make you feel good in the moment, but it also has lasting effects on overall happiness and life satisfaction.

Gratitude Can Help You Achieve Your Goals
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If you’re working towards a goal, be grateful for what you have – even if it’s not what you ultimately want.  This can help you achieve your goal because gratitude creates a sense of abundance, which in turn motivates you to keep pursuing your goals. Additionally, research has shown that people who are grateful are more likely to reach their goals and feel increased satisfaction when they do.

The science is clear: gratitude has a number of benefits for both mental and physical health. So if you want to improve your relationships, sleep better, feel less pain, have more energy, or just be happier overall, start practicing gratitude today! You may just find that it changes your life for the better.

​This Holiday season, take the risk and go for the gratitude that scares the shit out of you. Most of us *think* about the things we are grateful for. That's great - but there is a deeper and more fulfilling experience to have if you're willing to take the risk to experience it.

Many people report that when they focus on what they are grateful for, this automatically generates a fear that they will lose those things.  This, in turn, causes many of us to avoid gratitude - consciously or unconsciously.  We think that if we hold back just a little bit, we can be saved from the future pain of possible loss. But loss is part of life, and living a little less fully doesn't save you from it.

In fact, research shows that gratitude actually helps us cope with crisis. As we cultivate a gratitude practice, a psychological immune system forms that helps to cushion our fall when we encounter adversity.  There is scientific evidence that grateful people are more resilient to stress, whether minor everyday hassles or major personal upheavals.

I'll bet that there is something - or many somethings - that if you allow yourself to really FEEL your gratitude for it, you will cry like a little baby. You will shake, you will shiver, you will be brought to your knees. You will be humbled, frightened, elated, ecstatic, startled, in-awe... raptured. This is gratitude from the soul.

This is the kind of gratitude that wakes the Universe up and puts Her at your command. It moves obstacles in your life and opens doors. This soul-shaking experience of gratitude is your 'magic beans' and your pair of 'ruby slippers', and the more you practice it, the easier it is to live from this space allowing more 'magic' to seep into your everyday.

Taking the time to focus on the subtler treasures of life - such as a fresh breeze, a breathtaking view, a stranger's beautiful facial expression, or a blooming plant - takes life to a new level of fulfillment a pleasure.  Once you learn to cultivate it - you'll never go back.  Life passes us by, and the magic of the present moment often eludes us.  As humans, we miss out on opportunities to connect with humanity, savor our lives, and recognize all we are grateful for and appreciate.

Happy Thanksgiving week to each of you, and may you each find a million moments this week to experience awe & gratitude for:

• Yourself (and your unique quirkiness, strengths and weaknesses)
• Your relationships (friends, family, and difficult people that have taught us)
• Your 'things' (your home, running (clean) water, indoor plumbing, your ipad, microwave, coffee maker, blankets, slippers & jammies.. just to name a few)
• Your life experiences (the good ones, and the bad ones that forged you)
• Your health (the fact that you can walk, talk, see, and digest food)
• Your body (that it allows you to feel the wind, and smell a Christmas tree)
• Your choices (and the incredible blessing of being able to make mistakes and get back up)
• Your freedom (and the vast array of freedoms you experience)
• The time you live in
• The place you live in
• The inventions you enjoy (like being online right now enjoying social media, or the miracle of flight that allowed your family to come visit with you)
• The awesomeness of nature (the mountains and the stars)
• The love from your pets
• The taste of pumpkin pie and stuffing...

It goes on and on...the gifts that each of us has are endless. I hope you experience this vastness this week as you celebrate the holiday.  I hope you take the risk and go for the gratitude that shakes you to your bones. 
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Happy Thanksgiving.

And just for fun, one of my favorite videos about gratitude:

We all have moments of resistance in our lives. Whether it’s resistance to change, resistance to new ideas, or just resistance to taking action, these moments can hold us back and prevent us from achieving our goals.

While resistance is a natural part of life, it’s important to remember that we always have a choice in how we respond to it. We can either let the resistance control us, or we can choose to let go of it and move forward.
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When we choose to let go of resistance, we open ourselves up to new possibilities and new opportunities for joy. Here are three reasons why letting go of resistance is key to finding more joy in life
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It can be difficult to discern whether we are making a decision based on what we think or what we feel. In many cases, it is a combination of the two. However, there are some key differences between the two that can help us determine which is motivating our decision.

​The mind is rational and logical. It processes information sequentially and analyzes pros and cons. The heart is emotional and compassionate. It allows us to empathize with others and make decisions based on our values.
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​We all know that feeling. It's the end of December, and we're reflecting on the year that was. We start thinking about all the things we didn't accomplish and how we want to change that in the coming year. And so, we make a resolutions list for the upcoming year. But then January comes, and we find ourselves struggling to keep our resolutions. Why does this happen?

The problem is that we often set resolutions that are too vague or too ambitious, and then we don't have a plan for how to achieve them. So, this year, let's change that! Here are some tips to help you prepare yourself to achieve your new year's resolutions.
Feel The Vibe 
The number one thing that you can do to prepare yourself to slay your New Year's resolutions this year is to develop a wild, heart-pounding, burning YES! to pull you forward towards what you want.  Let's face it - change is hard.  It requires the FOUR D's:  The Dream, The Discipline, The Discomfort, and The Dedication.  Research shows that the people that are successful in achieving their goals are the people who are deeply connected to their dream.  So, the first thing to do is connect with the story of your dream and feel the vibe of what you are creating for your future.   

Pick One Thing
One of the biggest mistakes people make when it comes to New Year's resolutions is trying to take on too much at once. So, this year, pick one resolution and stick with it. Trying to lose weight, quit smoking, and start exercising all at the same time is likely to be overwhelming and will increase your chances of relapse. But if you focus on just one thing, you're more likely to be successful.  Your dream life can be created by developing the ability to direct your full focus on one small area at a time.  

Get Smaller
Your New Year's resolution should be something that you can realistically achieve. If your goal is too lofty, you're setting yourself up for failure. For example, if your goal is to lose 100 pounds, that may be unrealistic and could lead to unhealthy methods of weight loss such as crash dieting or over-exercising. Instead, try setting a smaller goal such as losing 10 pounds or slowly increasing your activity level throughout the year.  It is better to say that you are going to walk around the block 1x per day and actually do it - then to say that you're going to work out for 2 hours 3x per week and never get around to it.  Additionally, remember that self-trust is like a bank account, and you want to make sure that you're making more deposits than withdrawals.  

Be Aware
Once you've set your goal and figured out how you're going to achieve it, it's time to create a plan. This plan should include specific milestones and deadlines so that you can track your progress and adjust the course if necessary. Without a plan, it's easy to get off track or become discouraged when you don't see results immediately. But with a plan in place, you can stay motivated and on track even when the going gets tough.

Celebrate
One of the key pieces to goal achievement that people often gloss over is celebration, but celebrating your success is key to keeping motivation.  You see, when you celebrate yourself, your brain is flooding with the good hormones - the ones that make you feel invigorated, confident and motivated.  So, when you set small goals, and celebrate yourself for achieving them, you hack your brain's natural chemicals and set yourself up for success. 
Making New Year's resolutions is a great way to reflect on the past year and set yourself up for success in the coming one.  All too often, our well-intentioned resolutions fall by the wayside because we don't take the time to set ourselves up for success. This year, avoid these common pitfalls by feeling the vibe, picking one resolution, setting achievable goals, creating a plan for how you're going to achieve them, and celebrating yourself along the way. With these steps in place, you'll be well on your way to making this your best year yet!